Girls & Women in Sports
Happy Girls and Women in Sports Day!
As a woman in sport and a former female athlete I recognize the incredible value that sports have provided me and my life. There are things that being an athlete taught me that I’m not sure I would have learned otherwise.
I learned:
Teamwork: Being on a team taught me how to work with others to achieve a collective goal. I learned that it’s important to lean into my strengths because that is what I bring to the team to make it better and my strengths will help us achieve our goal. I learned the importance of creating relationships with teammates, because the stronger those bonds are the better connection you have on the field.
Leadership: I learned that there are different forms of leadership. There are people that lead with their words, whether it’s encouraging the team, providing direction, or communicating well. There are also people that lead by example, and show others what the requirements are and the culture is based on their actions. One isn’t better than the other but both are needed. As an athlete I learned how to lead with my words and actions.
Mental strength: I can’t tell you the amount of practices and games where I was exhausted and my mind was telling me that I didn’t have anything left in me. But yet, I kept going and I did have more in me. I learned through those experiences that I can’t always listen to my mind. Because my mind is going to give up a lot quicker than my body. And sometimes games are won in the last few seconds.
Perseverance: I can remember my first year of college soccer, I wasn’t getting much playing time and I was disappointed. But I knew that if I kept showing up, working hard, and improving my time would come. And sure enough my time came. It could have been easy to get down and discouraged because I wasn’t playing but instead I persevered and that work paid off.
Commitment: Sport requires commitment. It adds hours to your week with practicing, games, travel, team activities. Along with all of the other things you have going on. School, friends, family, other hobbies, and maybe even work. You learn to prioritize what is important and how to have time management skills. But you also learn that when you commit to a sport, your team and your coach are all counting on you, so it’s important to make sure you honor that commitment and show up for them (as well as yourself).
Growth mindset: This may be one of the most important lessons I learned through sport. I played a lot of different sports in my life and with each one I started at square one. And I learned that as I practiced and committed myself to working on things and improving I actually did get better over time. So rather than feeling like you’re either naturally good at something or you’re not, sport taught me that practicing will make you better. It might take longer than you want but it will happen.
These lessons have shaped me beyond sports. It’s what helped me grind through my Master’s degree while working two jobs. It’s what’s helped me build a successful business while also having a good work-life balance. These lessons help me show up my best for my family and build strong relationships.
BUT, even though there are lessons I’ve learned from being an athlete, it’s definitely not easy being a woman or girl in sport.
Women and girls in sports are consistently overlooked. We historically get far less investment in our development. We are told to prove ourselves before we get the support we need. And the opportunities in athletics for women and girls are much less than men.
On the mental side of it, women and girls in sports experience similar mental struggles as their male counterparts. However, there are a few mental obstacles I see more often in girls than boys.
Perfection: So many female athletes feel they can’t make a mistake. They feel that if they aren’t perfect then they aren’t good enough. And this standard of perfection creates so much pressure and stress that sport becomes less enjoyable. Plus, when they are holding themselves to perfection they are constantly disappointed in themselves because they aren’t meeting that standard.
Social anxiety: There is a lot of social pressure in female sports to fit in with the group. There is also the worry that others are judging us. And this can get in your head and make you overthink things or worry too much about what other people are thinking about you. And when you’re thinking too much that is usually a sure fire way to prevent yourself from performing at your best.
Coach/athlete relationship issues: Unfortunately, women’s and girls sports are still primarily coached by men. And I’m not saying this is always the case but there are a lot of male coaches that don’t realize you can’t coach female athletes the same way you coach male athletes. Female athletes are different in the way they interact, respond to things and interpret a coach's behavior. And more often than in male sports, women’s sports requires a more individualized approach with each athlete. Because of these misunderstandings I often see a lot of coach/athlete relationship issues interfering with an athletes performance.
Losing the joy or fun in sport: When mental performance issues aren’t addressed or they persist for long periods of times, this is when the fun in sports starts to dwindle. Something that you once loved and enjoyed playing becomes less enjoyable. And you may even dread it.
Sport doesn’t have to feel like that for girls and women in sport. I help athletes learn to overcome these mental obstacles every day. So that they can truly enjoy playing and reap the benefits that sport will add to their lives.
Don’t let the mental obstacles hold you back from being a woman or girl in sport. Schedule a consultation today to overcome the mental blocks you’re facing.